I actually wrote a blog post in the midst of one of the worst weekends I have had in a long time. It was a mental post that I’m not sure will ever be placed into blog world. But then perhaps it would be cathartic. Maybe when I am in a better mental state and can more clearly present it. Until then, here’s my watered down version.
Saturday started out pretty well. I had a bit of shoulder pain and some lower back pain. Hubby and I had been working on a puzzle, so although it was painful, I pushed through since we were so close to completing it. I was hoping if I just kept moving it would work itself out. So, I swept and mopped the hallway and our bedroom. And then set out to clean the bathroom (it was long overdue). By the time I was halfway through, I was starting to feel the pain spreading throughout my entire body. Despite that, I completed the task and decided I’d utilize the heating pad and just take it easy. However, hour by hour, the pain became deeper and deeper. I ended up in bed the rest of the day and had absolutely no appetite. Smelling of muscle rub, wrapped in a heating pad, weak and frustrated beyond words, I tried not to mentally lose it.
I struggled to sleep throughout the night and by morning, I was feeling things becoming worse. I knew I was on the cusp of a migraine, so I attempted to do my best to relax. Nothing worked. By mid day, I was writhing in pain and the migraine took hold. I tried to at least to get something to eat, but that wasn’t to happen. I laid there in a puddle of tears and pain drool, and wished myself to just pass out. My DIL brought me meds; my hubby tried to massage my muscles and soothe me. I couldn’t even stand to lie in bed as the pressure of it on my muscles was excruciating. My pillow felt like a rock. By late that evening, the pain started to lighten up. I was in a mental stupor, but glad to have the pain no longer trying to push me over the edge.
Today, is a day of recuperating. I’ll have lost almost 2 and half days and that bums me out. But, lesson learned again: mental energy does not equate to physical capability. . Oddly, this is not the first time that I have had this issue after the cleaning the bathroom. Seriously! I think between the bending and twisting, and the cleaners, my body can’t tolerate it. It is one of reasons I was glad to be living in a hotel for just over a year, bathroom duty didn’t belong to me. And as for future bathroom cleaning sessions? That task has been relinquished to the hubby.
This has already meant a slow start to my week. And exercise won’t be happening until I regain my footing. But I remain determined in my goal. My willpower remains strong. The power of wellness will not elude me. I think some light yoga will be my go to as a restart.
Willpower to Well Power 